Commentary

Obama Floats as McCain Flails During Presidential Debate

I watched last night’s presidential debate between Senators McCain and Obama while enjoying a fine home-cooked potato dish and a full-bodied pale ale. It was quite an entertaining spectacle. McCain darted around the room flailing his arms like a zombie robot on fire, his hands snuffing the life out of the mic (maybe someone put an Obama sticker on it) while feverishly drilling home the point that he was among friends. Obama, meanwhile, floated gracefully across the floor, like some bizarre mix between a southern preacher and the legendary dancer Fred Astaire.

This was supposed to be McCain’s arena, but he seemed very uncomfortable and anxious – which may be a physical manifestation of his recent slide in the polls. Or, a more sinister force may be at work.

I wrote a piece on Monday about my theory that the financial crisis was turning American and European politicians into zombies. I think the plague has claimed another victim. Originally I believed that the two presidential candidates were temporarily immune as they battled on the campaign trail away from their undead colleagues.

But, much to my dismay, McCain was exhibiting the mannerisms of the zombies from the film “28 Days” – which, I am firmly convinced is the zombie strain that is affecting European politicians. The Wall Street Crisis is wreaking havoc on McCain’s poll numbers. With less than a month to go before the election, he needs to act without thinking. He is crying out for the liberation provided by the crude but effective genetic autopilot that guides zombies through their day.

Obama seems to be resisting the zombie virus at the moment. His ability to turn complete sentences into coherent thoughts offers some measure of comfort. Although, the campaign is not over, and the young senator from Illinois may yet join the growing ranks of undead politicians.

But, on a more serious note, I feel that neither candidate adequately addressed the economic crisis raging across the globe. For your benefit, I have compiled a few quotes with corresponding links from both left of center and right of center publications concerning the outcome of last night’s debate. Please leave a comment or make a selection on the poll located on the home page.

From the The New York Times:

“There were no obvious dramatic breakthrough moments by Mr. McCain; indeed, although the two men pummeled back and forth, it was Mr. Obama who more consistently drew sharp contrasts between the voting records and campaign promises of the two.”

From The Washington Times:

“The rocky economy has boosted Democrat Sen. Barack Obama in the polls, but last night, he offered no new proposals. Instead, he said the current economic crisis was the ‘final verdict on the failed economic policies of the last eight years’ that President Bush pursued and were ’supported by Senator McCain.’”

From the New York Post:

“Some points Obama responded to, some he let go. Thing is, he knows all he has to do is to appear a plausible president. Even if he loses the debates on points – which he probably has in both – he still wins politically if he doesn’t take any catastrophic blows or make any discrediting gaffes.”

And finally, the Daily News:

“Most important for Obama, he went a long way to establishing his commander in chief credentials through impressive answers to national security questions on Pakistan and Afghanistan. Coming as polls show more people view him favorably as a leader, the debate should add to Obama’s lead in the key swing states.”

Please leave a comment or make a selection on the poll on the home page

© 2008 Splendid Marbles.