I REALLY hate budget cuts!

Remember it’s a “don’t ask, don’t tell” mission.

I call it the Al Gore.

Wait a minute, aren’t we wupposed to be using the pit bull for this job?

We said “Ram” not “Poodle!”

This is why France will never rule the world.

Fifi had her nails sharpened for the mission.

It’s a good thing for Fifi they didn’t completely shave her head.

The invitation said “No Children”

I have always wondered what a poodle is good for..

Never send a man to do a womans job!

“Carry her to the Royal Latrine so her paws don’t get dirty, they said.”

I still like the Trojan horse idea better!

Ya know, if we prop this thing up on the wall, we can climb in that window.

Ahh the dog days of the middle ages.

“They’ll never see this coming.”

“Why can`t we get a day job,I hate working Knights.”

“I miss the King. Ever since he died and left the queen in charge we’ve been running around in Skirts and doing weird things with poodles”

I said LOG not DOG!

This is my trusty servant Patsy. We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join me in my court at Camelot. I must speak with the lord and master of this castle!

Hey Bud, when I said I wanted hot dogs for lunch I didn’t mean this!

When Perry the poodle was told he was going to visit Grandma he didn’t realize that it would be in heaven!

Who’s up for Wienerschnitzel for lunch today?

If this doesn’t break the door down we’re going to look really stupid.

Why is a RAM in the ass called a GOOSE?

Is today “bring your dog to work” day?

“Think they’ll like us better this way?”

I know their king is afraid of dogs but this is ridiculous.

Remind me to have a talk with the designer afterwards.

No more next time.

I should’ve went to archery school instead.

Don’t complain to me — it’s not my “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy!

“There’s no reason why we can’t look fabulous while laying a siege!”

Shouldn’t we try knocking first?

But our commander said this dog is the key to conquest!

This seems like a hard way to shorten a dog.

Do you think this skirt make us look less intimidating?

What? This is the only good use for this breed!

“‘The Lion in Winter’… ‘The Poodle in Summer’… I don’t see the difference!”

“I personally think a Continental cut would have been more flattering!”

All bite, no bark!

We forgot the collar! Now they’ll never know it was us!

Mon Dieu! This is the last time we let Pierre design the weaponry.

Hope nobody takes our picture and puts it on Facebook

“Start barking.”

“I promised my grandmother I’d have Pooch back tonight in good condition.”

“Fifi has enough custion on her head that it won’t even phase her.”

Great idea, Henry. It’s about time that damn dog earned his keep!

“Okay, guys, when the poodle pinata breaks, stand aside until the soldiers run out to grab the candy, then get ‘em!

We look ridiculous! I told you not to carve the battering ram!

I realize poodles are the “in” thing, but this just seems extreme!

“The damn thing has legs. Why are we carrying it?”

“Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”

“He said it was a bitch of a job.”

And they wonder why no Kingdom takes us seriously!

Alright Carlos, your idea had BETTER work!

“The uniforms make us look fierce, the poodle makes us look fabulous.”

When I said we should give the french a bit of their own medicine, this is not what I had in mind.

This isn’t working… turn her around, we’ll try the cannon instead.

Stop complaining Knight! The rookies always get the raw end of these missions, it’s tradition!

‘Queer Eye for the gate guy’

“Explain to me again how this gives us the advantage…”

If this doesn’t work we’ll break out the “Dobbie”

Remember men “sticks and stones will break our bones but names will never harm us”

“You think this is ridiculous?? Wait till you see what she gave us for arrows!!’

Men! It’s working! I can hear them laughing! Retreat and launch the wheeled bag of flaming dog poo!

“Well you may use a ram in the country Claude but please….this is Paris!”

The very first military acronym

Poodle
Entry
Through
Archway

Don’t ask, it’s a long story.

I know Cesar says not to pamper your dog, but geesh!, aren’t we carrying that a bit too far?

Well, my wife did tell me to take Brigitte for a run.

Maybe we can still convince LeBron to come back to Cleveland.

The beanstalk Giant won’t miss his big dog for awhile.

“So this is what you get when a ram and a poodle mate.”

Oh, it was a Trojan Horse? I always get that story mixed up.

It’s already been done? Really?

Once again Fifi saves the day!

But we are French! No? We are famous for doing things with style and flair!

Count me out. I don’t have a dog in this fight.

Oui, Pierre. This plan has a certain je ne sais qua!

“I’m surprised that the King and Queen registered at “Long Dogs R’ Us!”

“You had to forget the leash!”

Damn Budget Cuts!!!

Ok, if this doesn’t work then we’re bringing in the Rottweiler.

I hope the Queen likes the door draft stopper that we made her for her birthday.

Henry, did you remember to bring the doggie poo bags?

“What happened to all the kings horses and all the kings men?”

“Hush and count your blessings. At least it’s not a pink elephant.”

“Somewhere there’s a king laughing his ass off about this.”

“Remember, when we’re drinking at the pub tonight do not to discuss this.”

Are we not schmucks? No, we are dickheads.

“Remind me to tell the Queen Mother what she can do with her poddle.”

ok, it’s “poodle” not “poddle”. I need to go take my meds. Sorry about that.

Originally a service animal, the ramadoodle often did not survive to breeding age and are all but extinct.

“Fido deserves the credit… I got the idea playing fetch in-doors.”

“If nothing else, hopefully it will break him from chasing parked carts.”

“It ain’t no ‘Trojan horse,’ but ‘Ramming dog’ is a rather catchy phrase, huh?”

“We’re ahead of our time – someday they will mark this on the calendar as ‘take your pet to work’ day!”

Great idea, Pierre, it was so hard to hold the fur in the middle during our last siege.

“Light as a feather…stiff as a board. Light as a feather…stiff as a board…”

“My horoscope for today says: Increase your productivity. Multi-task.”

I told you this would work; none of the archers will risk shooting a poodle!

Hey Frank! Is there toilet paper hanging out of my pants? I keep hearing laughter.

Don’t you think Reginald has been a bit flamboyant in his battering ram carvings lately?

We will never live this town at Ye Olde Pub tonight!

Fifi always knew her pretty looks would open doors!

Does this poodle clash with my helmet?

Is poodle burn covered under our health plan?

I tell you, King Arthur will not allow Sir Lancelot’s dog at the Round Table.

Neal, I still can’t believe you lost to a pair of twos, you told me you had this hand in the bag.

I can’t believe Her Majesty had every battering ram carved to look like her poodle. This is supposed to be an intimidation technique!

Now this is what I like to call poodle power!

Okay guys, we have the Poodle Cannon in place. Light the tail fuse and run away!

Once we are victorious, all shall tremble in fear of the might of the all powerful and merciless Mr. Num Nums!

Hey, which one of you let the dog out.

I can’t run with this arrow in my leg anymore… grab the bazooka!!

Don’t shoot idiots, this is the gift for your King!

I didn’t read the directions. Is it head or tails?

I’m just sayin’ history probably won’t remember the guys who invented the ‘battering dog’.

Where’s Clifford the big red dog when you need him!?

Pull yourself together men! If we ever want to have our titles on a candy bar, we must do something outlandish!

“The poodle would make us look less threatening, you said! Tell that to the men shooting arrows!”

In retrospect, the Trojan Horse idea may have been a better choice.

My wife told me that I need to spend more quality time with Fifi.

And I though my Pug was hard headed!

Really? She said “It’s not you, It’s Me”? Man that’s lame!

Oh DAM…What did you eat?!?..and don’t try to blame the dog this time…

Are you guys certain it’s Knights of the Hound Table?

Roger!, stop tickling Her belly!

God help there ankles!

“Yeah, yeah. It’s always ram, ram, thank you Sam!”

“Hey this is going to be really easy. The artist forgot to draw the obligatory moat full of snapping alligators!”

The poodle-o-matic had a brief but memorable place in the dark ages.

YOU SHOULDN’T SEND A DOG OUT ON KNIGHTS LIKE THAT

Okay,this idea looked better on parchment. Aren’t we suppose to be inside the Log Dog?

Oww!A real arrow just went through my leg!
The Medieval Times in New Jersey uses plastic.

“Who but the king would send a knight out on a dog like this?”

Things haven’t been the same since our King
decided to become Queen!

I thought all dogs go to heaven?

How much shillings did it take to super size this dog?

watch out ..you never know what to expect at that end.